I had a draft of this blog ready to go.

I decided to go in another direction after learning that Derek Chauvin was found guilty in the murder of George Floyd and that 16-year-old Ma'Khia Bryant was killed by police within the same hour.

There are so many feelings that need to be felt. 

Grief. Rage. Devastation. Heartbreak. Numbness.

It's important that we take exquisite care of ourselves and each other right now.

And I don't know about you, but I have many more years of practice taking care of others than I do taking care of myself.

For most of my life, empathy tended to flow OUT instead of IN.

The words "How can I help you" made their way out of my mouth so much easier than "what do I need?"

In this moment, I invite you to ask yourself what you need.

Is it...

To move your body?

To spend some quiet time knelt down beside a favorite plant, watering it slowly and intentionally as you take some deep breaths?

To make calls demanding police accountability for Ma'Khia Bryant? (@justice4blackgirls on IG has a list of calls you can make)

To reschedule a meeting?

To call a friend that you feel safe to share your full range of emotions with?

To go pickup a favorite meal and leave the cooking and dishes for another day?

To turn off your phone and set it aside?

To embark upon a long walk to see what's growing in your neighborhood?

Something even better?

Here's a picture of our neighbor's gorgeous purple irises from my walk today:

I was reminded of this poem by Mary Oliver and wanted to share it with you.

We shake with joy

we shake with grief.

What a time they have,

these two

housed as they are in the same body.

This week's Outgrow the Grind podcast episode, "Setting Boundaries With Empathy," features my dear friend Katya Nicholas.

In it, we talk about how our empathy for others can get in the way of setting boundaries and what a difference empathy towards ourselves can make. Listen here.

I'm sending love to you and your loved ones.



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